Why am I so stupid?

Things are not sorted in a right way recently. All these prove that I AM STUPID.
Argh I didn't want to say this to myself. I never wanted to admit this. Now, it is proven.

Since young, I am always careless in whatever I am doing. One day, I am going to kill myself because of my carelessness. For example, my mother asked me to keep the newspaper in the cupboard. However, I was busy with something else. After 5 minutes when I am supposed to do it, I completely forgotten. You can say this is just a tiny little thing. But imagine, it happens at least 2 days once. My parents often get irritated with me behaving like this, selfish, they say. Only taking care of my own things but not the family's. I did try to change. I don't want to forget anything they asked me to do it. BUT, I can't.
Conclusion of this paragraph, I AM STUPID.

Next, I get myself nervous and stress up very easily that it normally ruin my big day in the end. Why can't I just calm down myself when something important is happening around me? I told myself that don't compare with other people especially among family or friends. I just want to do my best. But, thanks to my lazy-ness as well. I never work hard enough. That is normally the main factor of failure. Well in my case, my nervous counts too. I am repeating IELTS and I screw up my speaking test today. My teeth just can't stop shaking while I talk. Gosh, I can't imagine what is the interviewer thinking. It was just a small english test! Another incident, my first interview for medicine school. Why did I get blank out the moment I enter the room? What's so big deal? So I know, I am definitely failing again.
Conclusion of this paragraph, I am so bad in terms of everything compared to other ppl.
Total conclusion, I AM STUPID.

Trials is less than a week time. I flood myself with all sorts of other equally important things at this moment. My first and second interviews, repeating IELTS, ISAT.. etc. Relating all these to my nervous problem, I couldn't manage my emotion well to put all these aside when necessary, and pay attention on my studies. Everyday, I will only think of how embarrassed was I in the interview, imagining how low will be my percentile for ISAT compared to other people. Finally, I made myself sit down and start doing Mechanics pass year trial paper. To prove the title of this post, I couldn't do a single question without my friends' assistance.
So. I AM STUPID.

My father gave me the opportunity to study in overseas. Still, my results is not as good as other people. Even if I meet the academic requirement, I still can't get the skills to perform well in an interview. I am a useless daughter because I always disappoint my parents in everyway I can. My capability had gone to the wrong path.
Conclusion, I AM A STUPID DAUGHTER.

Ah my dream. Maybe it is true. It will only remain as my dream forever. I love what doctors do. But getting so nervous easily, distracted so easily, not able to meet the requirements to enter a good university, being a doctor will stay as my dream for my entire life. This leads to another question. What should I do if I can't be a doctor? No idea. I have no interest in other courses.
Why? Because I AM STUPID. I don't have the confident to put myself into a new environment which I will never be prepared for it.